So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
You should be grateful to be my roommate. My booty calls always drive you places in the morning.
Her inability to understand the word "moderation" is the achille's heel of an otherwise perfect human
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
So, I'm a little drunk in Seattle with Glenna, but we've all agreed that it's patriotic to think about Bill Clinton from time to time during sex. 'Merica
you missed 2am bagpipes and my roommate looking hot as fuck in a kilt
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
I wouldn't have found her if it wasn't for the vomit trail leading into my brother's room.
Fuck the system, do you have any medieval weapons?
I know he’s married, but he’s still a guy with balls and a dick. He noticed my cleavage and stared at my ass. He’ll call.
Randomize
