But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
I can't find my pants or my car
I didn't even hookup I think I took them off at taco bell...
ha omg I always lose my dignity at taco bell as well... so no big deal.
you called me at 4 in the morning to tell me that your toaster burnt your english muffin, and that you "fuckin hated that thing."
Hey for future reference vodka can not be substituted for water when shaving your legs
Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
At one point during xmas dinner my whole family was double fisting. It was like thats how I learned to drink moment
Apparently while fucking a girl in the ass last night I cracked a molar, trying to find a dentist now.
Sending emails to my new boss whilst unable to move from the toilet seat because of alcohol. Great start to a new job as a school counselor.
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
Does puke ruin car paint? Good thing it's raining.
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
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