She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
I showed remarkable dignity in such a compromising situation. Except I came off as sort of a blue ball giver.
i wanna pet his head its so fluffy. were gonna open a petting zoo
It's like split custody, only he's not a kid and they have sex with him.
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
Even though we had just had to physically take her off of someones lawn she was peeing on when they came outside, she still insisted on walking unassisted the rest of the way home. It was dignity meets shit show.
I had to smuggle a street sign attached to a 14ft long pole out of my house this morning. The list of reasons for me not to drink just keeps getting longer.
Dude what the fuck...
My period started right as he was entering, which really helped me sell the "I've never done this before" bit.
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
Think of something healthy and responsible. Now think of the exact opposite, let's do the latter
Randomize