THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
If I'm not up by 8, will you please knock on my door?
That depends, can you stop texting me while you're masturbating?
Touche.
I CAN STILL HEAR YOUR VIBRATOR.
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
Your mother liked my album on facebook that's only filled with drunk pictures. I don't know what to feel about this
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
i've created a new STD.
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
I think I'm destined to be the stoner version of one of those successful but emotionally unavailable characters Sandra Bullock always plays in movies
Just had an oven catch fire while I was balls deep. Fire department came, I did not.
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
That's the 3rd negative pregnancy test this month. I'm on a roll.
Randomize
