Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
Just woke up. I have a "Detective Jacob Arnold's" business card in my pocket.
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
I'm going to email her once I get off the bathroom floor
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
If you're in the liquor store 5 minutes before close, and you have to ask the cashier for a coin to flip to make a life decision because "vodka takes you to a bad place," you need to reevaluate your life.
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
apparently my buddy was fucking on our couch downstairs so i decided it was necessary to walk downstairs naked in a hockey mask.
I saw his new girlfriend. She was flashing people, short and kinda chubby. I was happy with my life after that.
he's like crack. I can't be in the same room with him while drunk and not do him.
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
I know I'm drunk but why am I receiving this handjob through the pant leg of my shorts..?
Randomize