I'm pretty hammered, I'll elaborate tomorrow
i just caught my roommate coming out of the bathroom half naked with a surge protector. he told me he didn't wanna talk about it.
I almost didn't recognize her with a shirt on.
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
I'm sweating while I eat mac and cheese. That fat.
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
She just shoved like three McNuggets in her mouth and started sobbing and I have no idea what's going on.
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
My mom found me this morning passed out, face down on my dinning room floor
That must have been one awkward situation haha
Well I woke up in my bed.... I don't remember her finding me
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
I got so drunk last night that I was drunk in my dream. Good night
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
Randomize
