I just watched a girl use a tall boy Coors as a rolling pin to make christmas cookies
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
Walk-of-shaming home in that dress you got arrested in. Six guys called out your name when I walked past. I've never been more proud of us.
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
Worst case scenario, I put a giant cork in your vagina so you don't give birth before my birthday
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
He initiated the conversation by sending me a picture of his penis at 4 am
Why does your life consist of lesbians, black guys and cats?
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
I wore grinch underwear to my well woman exam this morning and I feel like I adulted successfully today.
i found you laying on the floor staring at the ceiling and you kept muttering "why" in various inflections.
I just saw a guy faceplant off a unicycle while holding a saxophone, while his buddy riding another unicycle and sporting a flute rode by laughing
Only at UConn...
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