Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
happiness is walking an amphibious rodent on a leash
She tried to wake me up by touching my dick. I kept pretending to be asleep.
she called me a fuckfaceshitdick. not that's creative. it sounds like a crayola crayon, preferrably an orange-brown shade.
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
If you were a real friend you would have told me you saw me in a porno despite how awkward of a convo it is. You act like I should always know when I'm being recorded.
I could have made money off of that but no you had to wait 2 years to drunkenly tell me this shit.
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
She's blowing me while I'm watching air jaws. I love shark week.
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
Dude, you got arrested for trying to direct traffic with your dick....
Randomize
