He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
Balcony sex scratched the shit out of my phone. Whups.
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
I put the extra pregnancy test in my sex toys box as a reminder that my actions have consequences.
Maybe tomorrow I'll be drunk again and can provide you with texts at a more reasonable hour. Here's hoping. GOodnight. Tebow loves you
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
My google history for last night included "Whre is johns house" and "wher can i buy nukes?" Pretty sure they're related to one another.
Please don't throw the wedding bouquet at me
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
Conversations really do change when your social worker had your dick in her mouth the other night.
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
Randomize
