I left the party when things started to get crazy... and when I say crazy I mean: there was puke on the carpet, Evan was passed out behind a plant, Mary was making out with her ex while her present bf was making out with Nancy. Not to mention that someone fisted the wall. Also - someone is sleeping on your lawn - they might be dead, I didn't check. Later.
this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
i crunched every chip from the dorito bag and poured it in the vase. never again will i have to deal with cool ranch fingers.
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
I just found puke in my bra..
Bloody Mary Monday just took a turn for the worst... Just had a heart to heart talk with the cat about it's obsession with chewing on cardboard.... Time for a nap.
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
He came over last night and as soon as we started having sex Siri announced "you've arrived at your destination." I think it was some kinda sign
I haven't even had my coffee yet and you're being slutastic
Did you just affectionately call me a scrotum?
I'm noticing I drink less and do fewer lines when I do both together.
Now that's what I call smart money management.
Randomize
