Draw a picture of yourself puking and peeing on her and give it to her with a note that sys this could be your future if you be my friend
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
No driving. The car is spinning. I am praying for mcdonalds.
basically theres shrimp everywhere. splattered on the walls, in the carpet, its bad. ohh theyre never gonna get the smell out.
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
I don't really know how to say this, but I have an oven mitt to return to you tomorrow..
I like the odds of his and my children being professional athletes too. To support me in my old age, see I do think about the future.
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
If I come back tomorrow to find a certain football player tied up and locked in your closet, shit's gonna get real.
I'll set him free tomorrow morning ;)
Y'know i appreciate how accepting you are of me being a terrible person.
So why exactly are your shoes in my freezer?
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
you know you're sexually deprived when you're holding a warm taquito in your hand and your vagina starts to tingle
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