im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
I can't believe you big bird do not remember battling a shark last night it turned into a Pokemon battle and big bird over powered the shark
Remember that time I sent you a 5lb bag of gummie bears?
Like it was yesterday.
Apparently I had it on auto deliver. So whoever is at your apt is gonna gen an interesting delivery...
he literally referred to his penis as the alaskan bull worm from spongebob. when can we get married
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
I'm all set for mothers day, I let her beat me in beer pong.
It's amazing the amount I can accomplish with a glass of wine in my hand.
His wedding band got caught on my nipple ring and that's how I realized he was married
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
Randomize