whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
We went to IKEA super baked wearing fake mustaches. You?
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
In times of desperation, never...NEVER put green apple scented hand sanitizer on your vagina.
Reading an example in the GRE study book referencing Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles while wearing TMNT pajamas. *airfist*
omg please tell me you're eating pizza right now too.
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
Yes. I am out of condoms. I kept filling them with glow paint and playing with them when I was on mushrooms, which resulted in me having unprotected sex last weekend
Knowing there are different types of spiders in different countries and regions makes me never want to travel.
Being an adult can't be all bad. I just took a vacation day solely to sit around and get stoned
I’M DRUNK AND EXCITED.
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
Randomize
