About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
Apparently I kept telling people I was a pro tennis player again...
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
I hit him with a car. Nothing says I hate you more than backing into someone with a fucking car.
she called for a booty call so i sent mike as my stunt double
How was the party last night?
There's a mountain bike in the middle of our apartment. No one will claim it.
I just saw a herd of slutty loofahs run down the street...
Just saw identical twins riding scooters. Today is not real who the hell rides a scooter anymore
You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
Just licked cheese from my hot pocket off my phone. I spilled because I was eating a Popsicle at the same time. Send an adult please
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
On a scale of 1-10, how inappropriate is it to sneak into someone's box of sex toys and put googly eyes on their vibrator?
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
Randomize
