Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
i waited two years for her to sleep with me. it just didnt seem worth it.
she lost her virginity three hours after you dumped her.
are you serious?
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
I started crying during a meeting at work and now I'm sitting on my couch drinking boxed wine at 1:30 in the afternoon. Fuck you too estrogen.
Shit is getting real. I just adjusted my search radius for my dating profile to ANY FUCKING WHERE
If you get banged by this bartender you know you can't be mad at me right? Its the rules.
I'm really busy with my period
Randomize