I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
She forced me to throw up so it would "rejuvenate" me. It worked and then we took six more shots and did a keg stand. You know what I call that? Friendship.
Said he had been eating pineapple for a week before our 1st date. Not sure if thankful for his consideration or offended by his assumption.
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
I just found a GIANT thermos of sangria in my sink. I don't know if its still good to drink, but its good to drink.
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
I couldn't get past the raccoon on my porch so i slept on my lawn.
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
I'm going to take a nap so I don't feel like a stripper sneezed in my mouth tomorrow morning at work.
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
I feel I should send an apology letter to my anesthesiologist.
I woke up with my shoes on but pants in the fish tank
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
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