He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
I'm pouring my heart out in these texts and you're going around showing everyone???
i'm so bored i'm watching porn for fun. not even jacking off or anything. just watching.
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
I need to shower, but I have no shower curtain... I think I can get by with a whore bath and a hat for one more day.
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
It was all fun and games until she said "you're so pretty I wanna punch you in the face" and the proceeded to punch her in the face
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
Well, I woke up on a roll-away, with a knot in the back of my head and penis confetti stuck to me. Also, I apparently literally gave the shirt off my back right before I passed out, so I was topless. Vegas won this trip.
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
Banging to Billy Joel pandora is like russian roulette. But I made him cum to Let It Be so I we both walked away victors
Random question, what's John-that-we-had-a-threesome-with's phone number? Don't necessarily need the full number, maybe just area code? Think I drunkenly ran into him last night and now I have texts from a John.
Randomize
