Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
I can't live in this building much longer. People are starting to figure out that it's me making the weird sex noises.
Me and him getting it in is for special occasions only. Like Christmas and when they bring the McRib back.
Pretty sure I used toilet water to wash vomit off my face last night...
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
My horoscope should say: you're an alcoholic, get help today, Pisces
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
Randomize
