Joe is yelling at the trees again.
Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
I've really got to stop smuggling half full bottles of beer out of bars in my purse.
You were competing with my dog to see who had the stronger bark....
I know your texting costs money, but I'll pay for it if you consider this. Oversized frozen jello shots. I'll buy everything needed if you approve. Let me know
You don't have a penis so I'm not texting you at this hour. This is penis texting hour only.
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
You said you couldn't use your body anymore so you made me push the buttons on your phone while you made alien sound effects
Please don't explain what tea bagging is to my mother.
Randomize
