he wasnt into me til he saw how good i was at ms pacman. wtf why does this always happen? when she kisses pacman it was a little awkward, so i made my move. i went for more than one kind of banana last night!
he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
i will never coherently bang her
fuck off i hope your children turn out to be republicans
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
By midnight I was dipping doritos in frosting...that's how my simmer break diet is going.
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
I am literally sitting on the toilet in utter disbelieve that last night even happened. My god that was only Monday.
So after tonight I now have 6 Harry Potter movies left to get laid to. Before tonight it was 8. Fucking right
I just walked away from a youth soccer tournament popping every birth control pill I had left in the pack.
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
I responded with revoking his blow job privileges. Needless to say, he's learned his lesson.
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
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