this other lifeguard and I are actually considering paying a kid to shit in the pool
ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
He had rug burn on his nose from my landing strip
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
Zach is always passed out on the floor somewhere.face down in a puddle of his own absurdity
As we were passing the joint around, people were dunking Jenga pieces in Vaseline and sticking them to the window. I also smoked weed with a girl that was in an above the influence commercial.
Made a pinky promise to a lesbian on crack in WeHo. No one knows what I promised
Are you saying being a wizard and going to hogwarts wouldn't be life changing, believe in magic you fucking muggle
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
The night's not a success unless at least 60% of participants wake up with bite marks on their genitals the next morning.
I don't know what kind of parties you go to, but we should hang out more often.
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
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