Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
I'll trade you a raw potato for some vodka
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
They don't even know who I am but they just woke me up with maracas and invited my boobs to a kegger
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
You ever fart so bad at work that you think about taking a sick day just to spare your coworkers from the savage olfactory beating they are about to receive?
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
I was told i took a shot doing a headstand in the backseat then proceeded to barf all over my face
I had no idea you were so talented.
She fucked a bartender in a closed Applebee’s and has the nerve to call me easy
Last night was fun. Sorry I slipped out before you woke up
Also, your parents get up REALLY early. Please thank them for the bagel and travel mug of coffee. Happy Thanksgiving!
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