It's like a parade of train wrecks.
These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
Pretty sure I just convinced a drunk guy at the train station that I was from the future
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
Bad idea to be in a car concussed. I just described his dick as an elevator. I think i meant escalator, i dont know
I'm drunk off vodka and I haven't eaten today. I've never felt more like Kirsten Cohen in my life.
My brain is like scrambled eggs. If scrambled eggs were trying to escape out of my skull through my forehead.
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
I really should have gone with the man who kept offering me cocaine. Why did I chose the German!? STUPID!
I was using my Beauty and the Beast blanket as a makeshift skirt because no pants
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