Sitting in a bubble bath with my bong, how's your morning?
All I remember is having a LONG talk with a 23 year old mother with a 5 year old kid at a bar who told me "it's not that bad"
I'm going to superglue stuart's hands into socker boppers
Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame
WHY DID I INFORM THE ENTIRE BATHROOM I DONT HAVE AN STD?!?!?!!
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
He sent me nudes and then a text asking if I tried the new Cantina Bowl from Taco Bell. He sure does romance right, doesn't he?
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
I feel like I might be the only person I know who eats bundles of radishes in-between orgasms from their vibrator.
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
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