so im in the parking lot of taco bell eating a taco...and some girl just got out of a car and screamed at the top of her lungs "XANEX FOR SALE!!!!" i fucking love Hamilton.
I think dad's getting high again. His last google search was "awesome ping pong shit."
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
Sorry for walking in on you guys last night. FYI I have a bruise on my forehead from having the door slammed in my face. I deserved it.
I realised my life had gone downhill since being unemployed when I was making key lime pie on acid at 3am Tuesday morning.
the girl peeing in the stall next to mine has really cute shoes. on a scale of 1 to restraining order, how weird would it be to compliment them from in here?
That accounts for only three of the penises
Your vagina doesn't want to be violated with garnishes. I get it.
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
I'm literally trapped as the little spoon on a mattress on the floor of an unfinished basement with a professional athlete snoring in my hair
God does not give you boobs that amazing to not share them with your friends
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
Randomize
