Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
I just fucked a rockette. This would have been amazing a week ago.
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
i climbed out of the bath tub this morning and found him taped to the treadmill
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
You just referred to a pillow with a stolen bra strapped to it as "she". Let that sink in for a minute.
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
I love that my family celebrates every holiday with a joint. Chanukah? Mazel-juana! Easter? What's more spring than the color green? Election day? What better way to celebrate democracy in action than medical pot?
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
Need ride home. Girls. Stolen keg. Rolling down streets. Horny girls. No condoms. Rescue needed. girls and beer in exchange for rescue and bacon?
I. Hate. You. Where are you, are said girls cute, and how did you know I bought bacon? And how does this always happen to you?
Smarter than the average bear
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
Randomize
