just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
im in a kiddie pool, high, with a keg in arms reach. If i had a sandwich and a blowjob this would be the best day ever
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
Made out with a girl in a wheelchair and rode her around while I was blackout. On a new level.
I was dressed as bob Ross as this occurred
somehow a sneeze triggered me puking over everyone in the car
I think I might be drunk enough to cut my own hair
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
If I die it's either cuz I undercooked my burger or because I used questionable cheese. I have no pants on, so if there's a wellness check, you go in first.
What're you gonna do with the rest of your night?
Probably watching cooking videos and fantasizing about pie
Already drunk, almost got in a fight with a bunch of irish chicks. And another with canadians. On my way to get a tattoo. I plan to regret this trip.
Hey Girl, we got home safe!
I know, I drove you
I gave Sophia a glitter bomb for Christmas. And before you ask is because she pooped in my cat litter box and then drank all my liquor and didn't pay me back and refuses to acknowledge that she had any wrongdoing. So she gets to clean up glitter for the next 10 years.
Randomize
