all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
I'm like a wolly mammoth down there. what do I tell him?
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
Exactly, finding that perfect flask to come with you on all your adventures is like finding the perfect wedding dress. You have to feel it.
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
My nose hurts from that stripper beating me with her tits
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
Sexting and pancakes... It's going to be hard to top that
If he ever pulls my hair again, I'm going to conveniently have lock jaw. Then he can decide whether pain during sex is still fucking appealing.
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
And the you walked in and said to the only under age dude "IM NOT SLEEPING WITH YOU TONIGHT!!!" You may not have high standards but thanks for not sleeping with my brother!
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