you left a giant bottle of vodka in my room from last night. does this serve as a parting gift or hush money?
why is there a sandwich nailed to the wall
Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
He pulled out, and the resulting cumstain on my sheets is in the shape of a fetus. The irony of this is both awesome and terrifying.
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
What am I doing? I'm usually only attracted to horrible people.
It's a herpes check up not a beauty pageant
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
Randomize
