i ate 2 chicken nuggets and puked out 5. that doesn't even make mathematical sense
if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
Change of plans I'm coming home and shotgunning all the beer we have.
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
Ugh im hungover from last night, and to top it all off, I think someone jacked my laptop.
umm ya, so we found it in the oven wrapped in a pillow case this morning
Well, if I’m not getting dick or sleep then I’m not interested.
I should probably just LinkedIn request everyone I've ever slept with so they stop popping up on my suggested connections list
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
Randomize