if i were to get pulled over right now, the only thing i would be guilty of is listening to 90's Mariah Carey
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
The kids I taught this morning even knew i was drunk. One of them even said, and I quote, "You smell like my dad after he goes bowling."
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
The background of my phone is you taped to the wall wearing a cowboy hat
The fact that you think I have a life is so flattering to me.
Haha, how do I word that nicely? "You got me to the edge of no return twice and failed to let me orgasm, therefore you owe me chicken nuggets or hot wings. Your decision"
I completely forgot I gave up beer. But airports don't count. They're like international waters. No rules.
I'm sobbing to NWA
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
I'm both gender and math confused
Ya, It's probably because whenever I close my eyes I see a kitten playing a banjo.
Randomize
