On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
Sadly him cutting me out of the duct tape dress was NOT the most awkward part of the night. It was a littleeee moist under there.....
Just replaced the batteries in my vibrator without turning on the lights. I need to get laid.
Good morning sunshine. Care to hear the riveting tale of Michelle and the Almost Great Night That Ended In An Early Morning of Karma Emptying It's Bowels On Her Guilty Shoulders?
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
wow thanks for pushing me towards an older man
you gotta start somewhere if you're going to be a trophy wife
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
I'm just going to use my debit card. I feel bad buying pizza with the money I stole from my roommate...so I'm going to put it in my piggy bank.
If it's any consolation she turned out to be has a collection of clown dolls she talks to crazy. And the cops knew why I was calling when she key locked the door from inside.
Randomize
