he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
hey just checking if u still hate me for sleeping with your sister?
Do you think my bosses would frown upon Jameson with breakfast on this holiest of days?
I thought we agreed, no more super glueing action figures to my dick
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
Happy anniversary, did you sign and mail in the divorce papers yet?
My vagina needs a break, I had to ice it with a beer bottle last night.
why does every cop we meet know your name?
Nobody on Tinder wants to give you a Blumpkin.
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
Shame is for Republicans.
Randomize