just found more coke in my pocket. i love not washing my jeans after every individual use.
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated.
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
Every man needs a table where they can sit and reflect on the successful penile conquests of the day.
he made a bon jovi sex playlist and started crying when "i'll be there" came on... how was your night?
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
You FaceTimed your mom in the back of the limo telling her how many guys you hooked up with at the concert
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
Sometimes in life you just have to realize the security deposit isn't worth it.
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
My girlfriend is so strong now. Like on the one hand its kind of hot because she can pin me down during sex, but on the other hand she picked me up and carried me bridal style at the company bbq.
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
Randomize