just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
So I just used shazaam to figure out a pairs figure skating song. I don't think I could get any gayer.
As I was puking last night I told them "it's ok I'm a paramedic"
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
I thought stuff was gonna go really bad after he filled the super-soaker with kerosene. but it all turned out pretty well.
All I remember is folk music and a lot of drugs. I am never going "on an adventure" with you again
I'm going to assume that "the army of generous folk dancers" is no longer a goal you are willing to fulfill
There is maybe 10 hours out of any given day we aren't sober.
How do you clean human pee out of a carpet
Inconspicuously
I sent my boyfriend to the bar so I could go out tonight and actually get laid..
Also, if you don't fuck me soon, I will die. I don't want to die like that.
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
I gotta stop fucking the bouncers. We are running out of bars to go to.
Apologies that our conversations always turn to butt sex or penis size. I thought we out grew that in our 20's.
Randomize