1:57 a.m. Where did you go???
1:58 a.m. What are you doing? I want to go home with you, why aren't you responding?
2:11 a.m. Heading back to your place now, will you let me in?
dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
he told me not be awkward when his girlfriend comes tomorrow. and then he made out with me
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
Oh I forgot to tell you that while you were in the bathroom last night I made friends with a gay man named Rodger from Venezuela and he kissed me cheek and told me I "knew how to shake my thing". From now on we go to the bathroom as a team.
He came up to me looked at my tits said they were huge, rated them a 7 and then asked if girls really do masterbate. To make it better, he put his hand up to my face and said his penis is longer than my face...
Actually it's really just going to be me drunk in your living room swinging from a pole on a tuesday morning.
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
i think you might have coined the term "slightly awkward pyromania"
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
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