why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
so he came in my eye... should i throw out my contacts?
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
She looked at me and said there is a 90% chance I am going to puke in the next 10 minutes. 10 minutes later she is in jack in the box throwing up. She has amazing timing.
I'm going to tattoo a maze on my back for the next fucker that tries to blow early ....
Can we have a celebratory fuck now that the lockout is over?
You're the best girlfriend ever.
I just peed in a flower pot on the veranda while crying and holding a drink
His morals are debatable, but his heart or perhaps his penis is in the right place.
His penis is crooked. Right place? Maybe he starts there, but then he slants.
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
I was looking for a pen and I stumbled upon my mom's vibrator. On a related note, yes I will be going out tonight.
I'm gonna cum garlic butter
God specifically crafted these hands to deal out orgasms.
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
Randomize
