Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
if i had a dollar for every time ive had to piece a night together like they did in "the hangover", i bet i could outsell their weekend box office earnings...
We really need to check into harvesting part of our liver now
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
I never thought the most recent texts on my phone would be with ASAP ferg and my ex...
What procrastination leads to: I have submitted a third of my job applications this week with a BAC that would get me arrested
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
I was going to be upset with you on moral grounds but then i realized free chocolate was involved
I told my mom Jesus would want me to snort drugs on his birthday
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
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