i wanted to tell my neighbors to shut up it was 4am, but listening to her rag on him for his minute man routine was actually entertaining
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
having sex with him is like cage fighting mixed with pilates...the condoms didn't stand a chance...
Your roommate is pacing with a pen in his mouth flapping like a duck. That brownie got me fucked but not enough to understand this. Come back!
He does that
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
Theres either a bag of coke in my pocket or a bag of anthrax, either way last night got way to serious
I found your Halloween costume. I think you shit yourself last night
May or may not have been going down the road shooting fireworks.
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
L'Shannah Tovah!
Whats that? My new stripper name?
When ur uncle gives you free weed, you take it
You know you're stoned when you tell your dog you're stoned only to realise he's not in the pickup
Randomize
