I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
I just used a thesaurus to write a sext...
His constant posting of "inspirational" Taylor Swift quotes over the past 3 days has me a little worried. It's like, holy shit dude, you're almost 30.
So there I was, eye fucking the waiter and I spilled beer all down my boobs
She's walking down the sidewalk with a notebook, a pencil, and a box of cheez its while yelling profanities at small animals.... I'm going 2 ask her where she was before this.
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
I'm having to shit out rocks
I feel really sorry for my toilet right now
Randomize
