Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
so i woke up this morning covered in mail. none of it is mine.
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
I stumbled in at 6am to find my cat in the window making a noise I've never heard her make. When I went to the window there was a goat outside staring at us.
Are you sure? Or did you just think there was a goat?
No there was a goat. I gave it a donut.
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
Please warn me if you ever end up in porn, cause I don't want to stumble across that on accident, okay?
I feel like I should throw some tampons around my workspace so everyone will know what's really going on
I'm just gonna clean the house so my Mom won't think I'm hung over. I'll just start with the toilet
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
He follows more cats on Instagram then he does girls.. That's how you know your boyfriend is whipped.
guy at the bar just asked how many cows we have on our land, then proceeds to ask me out. you know your from the country when....
Did you send me a cake saying 'Happy 1st One-Night Stand Ever'?
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
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