At some point last night I thought pissing in a bottle was an awesome idea when I woke up a little piss was actually in the bottle a lot was on my TV remote
If she didn't want me to pass out in her bathroom, then she shouldn't have such a furry rug in there
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
She was wearing a shirt that said "Just Do Me", holding a half of a bottle of Vodka, and was screaming at her friends "PUSSY JUST SWALLOW!" before she chugged the rest of the bottle.
Dude, if you don't take her, I will.
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
So after he broke the crutches and got us kicked out of McDonalds, we stole a bike and when we got back to the hotel, he jumped out the window into the bushes.
Yeah when he is drunk, he seems to think he is Captain Americas Canadian counterpart, Captain Canuck
You may want to re-read your sent texts from last night. You were texting me about your "fire shits" spelled 6 different ways between 3 and 5:30 AM.
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
Randomize