Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
Do you think if I puke at the gym they think is because I'm going hard walking on the treadmill?
There's a middle eastern man wearing a cow costume with tequila coming out of his udders, but I'm not sober enough to feel uncomfortable with it.
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
So you met him?
More like I walked in on him, drunk, naked, and doing "bathtub yoga". Please stop bringing your dates home.
A woman on my train just walked down the carriage in a wedding dress, crying and clutching a can of Carlsberg. Oh...
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
I'm never drinking again. I saw way more penises than I ever cared to see last night. And I've decided that I'm going to live in Scotland.
I need an explanation for both of these epiphanies.
Batchelotette party success. I woke up on the floor in nothing but a thong, a garter and a shirt that says Just Do Me.
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
Oh, cold wet seat on the 48! Are you piss? Are you the sweaty ass leavings of an obese person? Are you the spilled King Cobra from the night before? I do not know! I dare not smell to find out... Pants ruined...
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
from across the room i saw you look into your beer and whisper "i love you"
I didn't mean that as an expression. I'm literally asking if you want to watch Netflix and do nothing.
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