What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
Joe is yelling at the trees again.
know what the best part about malls are? standing on the upper level and boob gazing
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
He tried to write down the address for the cab on half a bagel.
I need you to stand in the corner and ref this threesome. Wear stripes.
He seems to have a lot of things figured out and most of the answers involve bourbon
Grandma is giving me marriage advice again. On the plus side, she thinks I'm straight now.
that's the best thing i've ever said to a penis
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
Some lady found my secret pooping bathroom at work. Do I fight her Highlander style? I made or may not be fashioning a crude sword from seat covers and toilet paper rolls.
Do it. DO IT. There can be only one.
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
Saw a dude last night at a strip club's bar eating canned pineapple and giving tootsie pops to the girls...
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
Randomize
