I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
I know its time to do laundry... i cant even find a dirty sock to wear because they all have jizz in them
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
Great. Now I'm always going to be the roommate that boned a guy with a third nipple.
I went commando last night, then accidentally flashed a police van...They acknowledged it.
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
Seriously you've eaten pizza pockets for every meal for the past 4 days
Well to be fair I wasn't alive for breakfast 2 out of 4 days
I'm so glad I was blacked out while I was going all exorcist in the bathroom. That's so not a memory I want.
found one of my socks in the dishwsaher... xanax
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
Optimism doesn't exist before 2pm nor do any other emotions.
Randomize
