Erica just called me. She woke up in a storage closet in Mike's building with one shoe and no bag. Can you check your photos from last night to see if she had it at the bar?
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
Everything smells like syrup. But I guess that's better than last time when everything smelled like beer.
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
I dont think a "sorry ive slept with most of your teammates" text will do much
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
Apparently she was filling Miller Lite bottles with water because I refused to be seen drinking water in a bar
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
I'm beer bonging chocolate fondue. That's how my Valentines Day is going.
Basically I will actually need a reindeer pulled sleigh to make it to all the penises in one night.
I was on top for a full on make out when in dead silence "I'm moaning Myrtle" came from the TV. Moment ruined. I got cock blocked by a fictional ghost
They think I'm one of them. I'm about to get drunk in a Santa suit and bust down the door singing Christmas carols.
My favorite part was when you kept telling everyone you were being "green" by drinking straight out of the bottle so u weren't wasting a cup.
Randomize
