You'll put your fingers inside me but you won't be my FB friend?
It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.
I didn't know it was possible to throw up mid-sneeze.
just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
I'll go out only because I know the starving children in third-world countries would frown upon us if we let an hour of free sangria go to waste...
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
Started the 4th with a foursome. I don't know if it gets more festive than that. #MERICA
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
he's so sweet and its so cute. but I swear to fuck if I let my guard down and this was all a lie I am going to become a serial killer.
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
There’s so much sex at the hospital I’m beginning to think scrubs were invented to make duty booty easier
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