How long can I microwave pasta with a 20 percent alcohol content?
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
I was just tagged in a picture with a bunch of people i don't know in a house i don't recognize wearing a purple cowboy hat and a boa...i hate tequila
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
Thinking about adopting a 16 yr old here. Her name is Abby and she likes vodka. We've bonded. I need a sober driver n e ways...
You called me 32 times last night just to tell me you felt a heartbeat in your vagina?
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
Will you judge me if i do shots in my basement closet first? No? Okay good
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
It makes me so happy that my local liquor store has a black lab that is there every day. Really tho - it makes the higher prices excusable.
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
my roommates gone so i can take codeine and sleep naked
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