Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
He smothers me through text. I can't even image what he'd be like in person.
do herpes really smell.
The lack of pants and amount of productivity in my life right now is amazing.
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
my greatest accomplishment from the city of diplomacy is that i puked at a table of 5 diplomats and my professor and NONE OF THEM NOTICED
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
i chased my gummy vitamins with cold bacon, never say I don't take care of myself
did you just send me my own nude
I have banged to "The Emperor's New Groove" way more than could possibly be reasonable.
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
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