I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
just woke up to a get well card i wrote myself when i was drunk. it was by the advil. i am a cocky bitch.
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
I don't know what I was talking about but I just threw up in ikea. You can't get out of this place it's a fucking labyrinth.
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
Someone just asked me why I drink so much. Im gonna slap a bitch
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
So, I've discovered that I'm approximately 70% nicer to my mother when I've had an orgasm in the last 48 hours. It's science.
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
I blacked out. Broke into their house. Took a shit, and left. This is why you can't leave me unattended.
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
Randomize
