Was i wearing a white blazer when you superpoke danced me??
Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
A few issues tonight. 1) Drunk since 1pm. 2) At the bar at 4pm. 3) James brought his sister, who has enormous breasts, isnt shy about cleavage, obviously slutty, and makes me want to do things that would even have Atheists sending me to hell. However, she's wearing glitter, so all Im thinking about is Edward Cullen. Go ahead and rip up my Man Card.
I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
Just found my car keys in your throw-up.
If I have to take him to the hospital, I'm drawing dicks on his face
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
Recycling day makes me feel more like an alcoholic than regular days.
She showed me her tits and my first thought was "I want these to feed my future children." I'm scared.
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
i found you laying on the floor staring at the ceiling and you kept muttering "why" in various inflections.
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
I'm currently drunk proofing my room
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
Randomize
